TS 3 Chapter 22

Chapter 22 

October 8^th, 2014

Zurich 

The half an hour car ride had been almost a trial for Guntram. Perhaps arguing with Konrad in the morning, during his brief visit before work, had had something to do with the feeling of absolute misery Guntram was experiencing when the large Mercedes parked in front of the summer cottage outside the castle. 

“Why don't we go to the main house?” he asked Anke, the nurse, sitting next to him. 

“Stairs, too many stairs,” the woman answered shaking her head gloomily. “You can't climb them and you won't want to be all the time trapped in the bedroom.” 

“Why are you always so bossy?” Guntram couldn't help to blurt out. 'She nearly drove the chauffeur mad with all her remarks. Don't go there, be careful, don't speed. This man is going to resign tonight.' 

“Because I'm your nurse and I clearly told you I didn't want to see you ever again in my ward. You didn't pay attention to me and now I will set things right,” she answered and Guntram sighed. 

'That was like fourteen years ago. Now I see why Konrad was saying she's like a Panzer.' He looked helpless how the poor bodyguard was shushed away by the lady when he tried to open the door for Guntram. 'Poor Martin, he's on her wrong side now.' With difficulty, Guntram managed to stand up and before she could say something for moving around without help, he greeted Monika, who quickly placed herself between the young man and his nurse. 

“I'm so glad to see you on your feet again,” Monika kissed Guntram effusively and ushered him to the house before he could say anything. 

“Am I staying here?” he asked once he was inside and one of the maids took his coat away. 

“The Duke ordered this house to be fitted for you, darling. The stairs it that old house are too much for anyone. They're everywhere.”

'Kicked out like an old dog,' Guntram thought but only forced a smile for Monika. He crossed the small foyer to enter in the cosy living room where he and Konrad used to come in the early summer to read while the boys played outside. 

The living room was gone. The sofas had given way to a medium size round table with chairs, two libraries and a large cabinet that looked perfect for a home cinema. Guntram walked a few steps inside the room and saw the huge bed against the farthest wall surrounded by medical equipment. 

“It's only temporary.” Monika added. “Once you're fit again, you can return to your quarters. The Duke thought that as you can't walk much around and the boys would like to be here with you, the best was to give you as much space as possible. Some of their toys are stored in the former bedroom. There's also a room for your night nurse.” 

“I see,” Guntram replied quietly as his mood darkened. 'I'm not a cripple.' 

“The children can come here after school and stay with you.” Monika explained him gently. 

“Why do we need all this?” Guntram looked gloomily at the switched off monitors and oxygen tank. 'They have the whole resurrection mambo set here.' 

“Just a precaution. Once you're better, they'll be away.”

“Exactly,” Anke said. “Once you're better, we all are away and I do hope this time you learn your lesson and never come back to visit me.”

Monika quietly laughed at her words and lightly embraced Guntram again. “We were so worried about you.” 

Still shocked because Guntram couldn't understand all the fuss about his health, he gently disengaged himself from Monika's arm and walked the final steps towards his bed. He needed to sit urgently. 

“Along with the toys are some of your materials,” Monika said.

“Thank you,” he whispered, his face turning ashen. 

“I think you must change into your nightclothes and go to bed till lunchtime.” Anke ordered with that voice that left no doubt she expected to be obeyed. She helped Guntram to stand up and led him to the door next to the bed. Frowning as he didn't recognize the new emplacement for the large bathroom, he had to lean over the marble counter because he felt very dizzy after a few steps. Anke steadied him and ordered him to stay there as she brought him his pyjamas. She offered her help to undress, but he refused. 

Guntram began to disrobe and gasped when he saw the long vertical, still fresh scar going throughout his chest. His fingertips traced the small bumps created by the removed staples. 

'What the hell did really happen here?' he asked for the thousandth time as doctors had been very sketchy with the information. Slowly, he put on the pyjama top and carefully, his left hand held firmly the button as the right maneuvered the buttonhole around it. The flashback of Friederich kindly asking him if he preferred to use buttonless pyjamas hammered his mind and bit his lips to cast away the image. “No, I'd better smarten up,” he had replied at that time and he knew that was the way to carry on no matter if his left hand still sent lashes of electrical pain through his arm each time he used it.  

Guntram felt totally embarrassed when he emerged the bathroom in pyjamas and Monika was still there. Noticing his discomfort, she pretended to be busy arranging the papers and notebook left over the desk next to the bed. Guntram slid under the covers and before he could sit against the headboard, the nurse was measuring his blood pressure.

“You should rest a bit and then, I'll get you lunch,” she said and Monika hurriedly went for her purse to leave the room. 

“Monika, I heard that there was some post for me.” Guntram asked before she could leave. 

“Oh, don't worry about that. The new interns are working on it. Those were just good wishes cards.” 

“Should I not sign them?” 

“It isn't necessary, darling. The Duke ordered that you were not to be disturbed with this. The teddy bears are already in the Lintorff Foundation and will be sent to children hospitals for Christmas.”

“Thank you, Monika. I hope it wasn't such an inconvenience.” 

The lady laughed. “We had to get rid of those plush beasts before the Duke was having a collapse. Imagine, on Monday, when he arrived to the bank, the entrance was covered with teddy bears and flowers for you. They also had some at the clinic but it wasn't as much as in the bank.”  

Guntram paled at the image. “At the entrance?” he asked. 

“Little girls too. Don't they have to go to school? Anyway, the Duke ordered the teddy bears to be picked up, -the security people wasn't happy about that- and be stored somewhere. If I didn't know better, I’d think those furry things were haunted. We put them in an office at the second underground level, but they kept showing up in the offices and in the most incredible places. The Duke was convinced that the traders were doing it on purpose and nearly fired them all. They're doing nothing these days and I guess they get bored and do silly things, dear. Finally, the animals were sent to the Foundation.” 

“Why are there traders still there? We are banned.” 

“No, not any more. All bans were lifted after you paid the fines. We got a clean sheet, so to speak, but the Duke prefers to use Michael's ways nowadays, Marvin and so on.” 

“I see,” muttered Guntram and the covers nesting him suddenly lost their warmth and coldness bit his soul. Monika kissed him goodbye and left the room. 

With a weary eye, Guntram looked at the two machines gloomily standing in one corner, next to an elegant classical cupboard probably filled with medical supplies. 

'All that jazz without a heart transplant.'

'That's what I get for playing in the big leagues.' 

Anke returned to the room and puffed his pillows before she took his blood pressure and forced him to swallow a pill. Still a bit overwhelmed by her powerful presence, Guntram laid down on the pillows and began to fiddle with his e-reader, not truly wanting to start a conversation with her. The rest of the morning morosely drew on. The minutes seemed to last hours while Guntram pondered about his father's true willingness to help. He had heard nothing about him since staying at the hospital and it concerned him. 

'Konrad can't really be against him. We don't know if he did anything for real. Though it looks like, he knows better. He knows me. He knows I would have never taken Konrad's place.'

'Yet he got me an army. My own army of crusaders.' He realized sullenly and bits of his conversation with Enrico flashed through his mind. 

'Those men were truly on my side. Is Enrico still alive?'

“You're very quiet today,” the nurse served him lunch and Guntram forced himself to smile while she set the tray.  

“I'm tired.” Guntram began to eat mechanically but recognized Jean Jacques' hand on the food and that gave him some respite as his life was returning back to normal. 

“The children will see you after school. They certainly have a lot of energy. I saw them yesterday. The smallest is quite a bundle,” she commented casually. “He told me he wants an octopus.” 

“He already has a lobster. We have enough with that.” 

“Then you should speak with your husband. He was about to get him one.” 

“Only if it comes in a glass,” Guntram mumbled and fixed his eyes on the image standing on his night table. “I thought it belonged to the clinic,” he said. 

“Oh no. The Duke brought it for you. He said it was a present from President Putin himself. Can you believe it? The Russian President sent you something.” She nearly whistled in admiration. “I don't believe much in such things but the moment she was put in your room, you started to improve. We were almost giving up on you.” 

“I see,” Guntram's mood worsened as he took a better look at the icon. 'From the XV century no doubt,' he remembered the many lectures on the subject Constatin had given him. 'It's not her fault to be a present from that man.' 

“Do you know him?” 

“Who? Putin? No, thank you.” 

“They say he has a mistress and a child in Switzerland. Right here.”

“I don't know but here is quite far away from Moscow.” 

“That's right,” she smiled and looked again at the icon. “It's a beautiful present indeed.” 

'I will probably have to write a thank you note to this man.' The memories of the meeting once more assaulted him. 'Why is Konrad so keen on that Russian? Russians hate gays, Alexei told me so and Constantin had a lot of problems because of that. Truth to be told, he was having a lot of problems because he was looking for them.'

'Ratko knows more than he what tells and why are we stocking up weapons, food and gold? The inventories my father showed me looked more suitable for a bunch of crazy “preppers” than for a charity organization.'

'Now I know why nobody ever asked a thing about what happened in Siberia and how I got every paper I needed for Kurt with no questions at all. Stupid me thought that we bribed somebody but maybe it wasn't necessary. Konrad and Putin are pals for the time being.' 

'Maybe they're pals since 2001. Konrad was doing his best to help Russians during last devaluation and you don't get a guy like Lavrov in your payroll just because you pay more.'

'You don't get your own father to plant a spy in your own nest,' he sullenly remembered. 'Typical Michel.' 

'If Konrad hated Marvin so much, he would have switched it off without a problem. Yet the thing was fully operational all the time, only working part-time.'

Guntram felt how the nurse replaced the pillows behind him but he said nothing so focused on his thoughts. 

'I'm an idiot. That Marvin thing has been there all the time, not for trading but for doing something else. Something much more elaborated and lethal. I was chasing after the pennies when they were doing the surveys for a gold mine.'

'My father somehow knew it and he said nothing to me. Typical. He just set me up without bothering to tell me I was engaged in another of his games but what's the big surprise here? It's been like that since I was born.'

Disgusted but worried, Guntram left the cutlery on his dish. His appetite was gone and a knot in his stomach made him feel sick. He rang the silver bell on his tray and Anke returned to him. 

“Not eating?” she asked with a frown. “This trout is one of the best I've ever tried.” 

“It's too big for me. I really can't.” 

“All right,” she took the tray in her hands and Guntram looked at her trying to gauge her intentions. It wasn't like her to give up so easily. “Will you take dessert? The cook is still here.” 

“Jean Jacques is here?” Guntram was surprised that his friend had not come straight to him, like he usually did. “Could you please call him?” 

“It's your nap time. You have already enough emotions for a day. Your sons come back at five and you'll be jumping around again. Not good.” 

Guntram became a bit concerned when it took more than half an hour to Jean Jacques to come to his room. 'Anke must be probably telling him the “not to do” list.'

'What if he's upset with me because Alexei is gone who knows where?'

Jean Jacques entered in the room and Guntram noticed that he had changed his clothes, leaving the white fatigues he usually wore behind. 'That's Anke's fault. She made him change his clothes,’ he nearly whined but Jean Jacques' smile was contagious and he let his anger go. After two effusive kisses as if he were a little boy -and Guntram wondered if the chef would ever stop considering him as such- his apprehension was gone. 

“I had to get rid of everything. Your nurse wouldn't let me in with a stained apron.” 

“I don't have Ebola,” joked Guntram. 

“We can't risk an infection and that woman literally sprays you with alcohol,” Jean Jacques smirked. “If she does that to the Duke, I'll cook her a full Christmas dinner for twenty people.” 

Guntram smiled. “Anke did that several times already and remember he was at her mercy for over a month. You'll have to cook for her whole neighborhood, my friend.” 

Jean Jacques chuckled and nodded. “How's everything?” the youth asked after the amiable silence. 

“I'm getting along with Dieter. Becoming manager got to his head a little but I put him back in his place. I'll be coming here for lunch and dinner.” 

“I truly appreciate that. You make a heart attack worthwhile.” 

“Don't say that. It isn't funny. Alexei nearly had one when he realized what was going on. He told me he could do nothing to stop it and thought you would bleed right there before a surgeon fixed you.” 

Guntram felt a bit guilty but only cast his eyes down. “Where's Alexei? I haven't seen him and I'm greatly indebted to him.” 

“He's in Russia or around there. Serving as some kind of ambassador for the Duke. He'll be back in a week or so.” 

“Putin?” Guntram asked innocently. 

“I don't know. Maybe. I have enough with defending my kitchen from your baby.” 

“What did he do this time?” sighed Guntram. 

“He has been trying to steal an octopus because we get them alive. No way. No, no.” 

“He has become obsessed with it. I'll talk to him.” Guntram replied but the pieces of the puzzle began to fall into place. Alexei was probably “explaining” his short reign as Magnus Commendator. 'And my policies too,' Guntram thought acidly while Jean Jacques spoke and spoke about his latest TV show. 

'I'm sure Konrad and the other see everything as a takeover. I change their open confrontation policy to another of hide your trash and they think I'm worse than a collaborationist. Konrad knows me better.'

'He knows my father better than me. Such a rubbish!' 

'Hopefully Alexei isn't in a mess because of me. He supported me all the time and even argued with Ratko. I really don't understand why they didn't say a thing to me.'

“All right, I'm going now.” Guntram heard Jean Jacques voice and returned to reality. 

“I'm sorry.” 

“You're tired. I'll see you later.” 

“I'll do my best to get Kurt off of your back. Send my greetings to Alexei and tell him I'd love to see him soon.” 

“I'll do it and next time, finish your dish or you'll be in trouble with me.”

* * * 

A slight noise woke Guntram up. Still groggy, he turned around in his bed in direction of the noise and saw the familiar bulk of Konrad sitting in the ample armchair next to his bed. “Why don't you come over here?” he asked and patted the empty space on the bed. 

“I didn't want to disturb you, Maus.” Konrad stood up and walked towards the bed and sat on it. “I was just sitting here, trying to convince myself that you were still here.” 

“It wasn't that bad.” Guntram moved aside to make room for Konrad's body but the man didn't lay down. “Why don't you sleep with me?” 

“And get that bulldog of a woman to shout me in the morning?” Konrad smirked but began to loose his tie. 

“Anke won't be back till midday. Carole is here tonight,” Guntram smiled in the darkness and Konrad softly touched his face. “You know them all too.” 

“All too well.” Konrad removed his jacket and shoes and laid on the cover, shifting his body so he could spoon Guntram's and put his arms around him. 

“You're exaggerating.” Guntram mildly scolded Konrad. “It wasn't that bad. See? I'm still here.” 

“It was.” Konrad answered sharply. “We all thought you wouldn't make it.” Konrad's hold became stronger as if it would help to chase the evil spirits away. 

“In Argentina, they say something like bad seed never dies and now you see how true it is.” Guntram joked lightly but Konrad didn't make a sound so he also became quiet, letting the silence voice their worries. 

Guntram's ears followed the sounds of his husband's respiration, trying to guess his mood but its steady rhythm told him nothing. There were thousands of questions ramming his brain but he didn't know how to start to pose them. The tide had changed but he wasn't able to read the waters any more. 

“Why did you send me here? Why did you cast me out of the house?” the young man finally asked. 

“Because I thought you didn't want to return to it after what happened and because is easier to take care of you here. I hope everything is to your liking.” 

“Yes, it is. Thank you,” Guntram answered automatically. The question burned his heart but he didn't know how to express it without creating a bigger problem. “I still don't believe what happened,” he said quietly and Konrad sighed as he broke the embrace. 

The minutes ticked as Guntram waited for an answer. If Konrad hadn't left the room, it meant he would get one. He turned around to face him in the darkness but Konrad stood up from the bed. 

Guntram sat on the bed, his back rigidly laid back against the headboard and imagined how Konrad paced around the dark room. For a second he expected him to bump into a toy left by the boys or hit himself against a piece of furniture but nothing of that happened. Konrad was able to wade the darkness with ease. 

“I would have given my life to be in your place in that operating table, Guntram. I never wanted this to happen,” Konrad's voice intoned gravely. 

“I never blamed you for this. It just happened.” Guntram quickly replicated. “I've been sick for years.”

“This time we went too far,” Konrad said quietly. “The circumstances demanded it.” 

“I'd wish I could understand the circumstances a bit better. I just landed on a job I didn't want and it seems people didn't want me to do... but no one ever told me a thing. I did my best to fix the problems that were presented to me.” 

“Ratko told you to stop several times.” 

“Perhaps, but he never gave me a single reason. He was just shouting and killing Barashi as a warning.” 

“Barashi was always selling himself to the highest bidder. Remember Venice? He was handing you to Repin without a second thought.” 

“It was a mistake. He apologized to you.” 

“Mistake? I didn't execute him that time because I needed his contacts in Libya. It was no mistake to break the rule of we give nothing to our enemies in our lands.”

“You were best pals with Constantin at that time,” Guntram spat the words. “He even was waiting for you to be over with me to make his move.” 

“A rule is a rule, Guntram. He knew better than allowing 5 kilos of Russian cocaine into our city.” Konrad's voice was dry and Guntram knew he had to step down or things would rapidly escalate. 

“It's all in the past now,” Guntram diplomatically tried to appease his husband. “It was shocking to hear that Lahon... suffered an accident.” 

“We are free to speak here.” Konrad pointed out. “I'm sorry you witnessed it. You should have left when you were told.” 

“I didn't have enough time to put the cap back in the pen before Mirko started his show,” Guntram barked incensed and Konrad stopped his pacing to face him. “I'm sorry,” he whispered contrite and Konrad approached the bed, sitting again on it. 

Guntram felt the weight shift on the mattress as Konrad's body came closer to him. The arms he knew so well embraced him and pulled him against Konrad's chest, letting him seek refugee there. 

“I didn't mean to shout you,” Guntram whispered as he buried his face on the finest cotton shirt. “I don't want to argue, just to understand what's going on. I think I have the right to know after I was dragged into this war. I only wanted you out of jail and one night I found myself in the middle of a turf war. I only wanted to minimize casualties as much as possible.”  

“Your mistake here was to understand all these provocations as a turf war, Maus.” 

Guntram looked at Konrad clueless and feared for his father's actions. “Konrad, I swear nobody here wanted you out. Alexei and I did our best to fix the problem. He's a hundred percent loyal to you.” 

I know,” Konrad answered. “He supported you to win time over and find out who was behind this plot. And he certainly did.” 

“What?” 

“This is not about five or six hashish cargoes lost in Marseilles. It's not even about dethroning me or Goran. It was about making us loose our greatest ally in this game. 

“This is not a chess game, Guntram but hundred or even thousands of them, all of them being played at the same time. You see only one board when there are many more boards, interconnected to the one you are looking at. 

“An attack in our territory was something we couldn't afford. Do you know where I was when the doctors were trying to save your life? In a plane to Moscow,” Konrad said. 

“In a plane to Moscow to explain how I was solving the situation caused by this stupid indictment. Do you think I was concerned about the money? That's nothing for us. That fine only looks well on the press but it doesn't truly hurt us. You saw it already. You spent weeks trying to rise a few millions and that computer got you what you wanted in less than two weeks, using very conservative tools, I might say.” 

Guntram gulped. 

“My main problem wasn't the indictment. We all knew everything would be nothing more than a nuisance for us. Do you think any European government want to see any of us sitting in an American courthouse?” 

“You wouldn't be alive by at that point. You suffered a heart attack in prison.” Guntram protested.

“So? Yes, maybe I would be dead but the tsunami of repercussions would destroy every single of their walls. Push one brick and the whole house of cards falls down, Guntram. We know exactly which bricks we have to push.” 

“Europe isn't a Christian land since forty years. My father saw that when he was in Russia. Ironic, isn't it? He was supposed to be killing Russians when in fact he was learning about them. When he returned to Germany, he was convinced Communism wasn't truly implemented in Russia. He used to tell me that the Imperial Russia was still there, camouflaged behind the gigantic portraits of Lenin and Stalin but if you looked closely, the Russians were still the same Christian people from before the Revolution.” 

“He decided that our alliance was to be with the Russians, not with the Americans. Their Pax Americana wanted to delete our individualities as nations and we couldn't accept that.” 

“Russians split your country in two. Remember Berlin and Stalin in 45.” Guntram huffed.

“Communists divided my country in two, not Russians.” Konrad said. “A bunch of adventurers supported by Henry Ford, Guntram. I didn't study the Russian language because my father wasn't sure of which side would win the Cold War. I studied Russian because we were waiting for the system to collapse from within. Why do you think I was amongst the first to invest in the country? Why do you think I said nothing when they went bankrupt in 1999? Even after being brutalized by decades of Soviet domination, Russians were still Russians. My father was always very concerned by the way things were going downwards in the West. Friederich was appalled by the Second Vatican Council’s resolutions and that was when we broke up with Rome.”

“So you are pro Putin.” Guntram said slowly. “All these years I though you defended Rome above all.” 

“Me? Never. Rome isn't Rome since a long time, Guntram. We can't sever all ties without arising suspicions. Our marriage was an excuse to keep distance from the new authorities but they kept coming back at us. We are a fish too fat to leave alone,” Konrad smirked in the darkness. “Friederich knew this kind of people very well, Guntram. They were one of the reasons why he left the Jesuit Order. Marxists who only pushed for the secularization of the church. Marxists disguised as priests. I remember how incensed Friederich was becoming each time someone mentioned Nicaragua. Look to what led the “People's Church”.” 

“Konrad, I was for the Third World priests’ movement. Father Patricio was one of them.” 

“Yes, he's part of a bunch of do-gooders who don't think on the consequences of their acts in their senseless quest for instant self-gratification,” Konrad spat the words. “Fortunately, you outgrew your naiveté unlike others. Your Father Patricio might had been from the movement but when I met him, he was quite aware of the importance of Evangelism. You too also. I checked all of your donations in your time as Hochmeister and nothing was spent on a stupid whim.” 

“Did I also get an audit?” Guntram growled. “Incredible.” 

“Only because some of the funds you allotted to one project ended in the wrong hands as it was brought to my attention by our own allies. Can you imagine how I felt when I was informed that 5 million dollars were now in Al Nusra's hands? How do you think it makes me look?” 

“What? I ordered nothing of the sort!” 

“Yes, you did. A counseling program for raped Christian and Yazidi women. They never saw a dime of that money. The funds were given to a bogus foundation which quickly passed on the money to Al Assad's enemies. I had nothing to do with the Syrian conflict before, I’m imprisoned by the Americans and what do I find upon my return? A truly upset with me Putin. I'm supposed to be one of his people in Europe and I'm financing terrorists who kill my own people.” 

“Konrad, I signed those cheques and that foundation was investigated before the funds were given,” Guntram protested. “What evidence do you have  to make such allegations?” 

“You gave the money to Barashi, right?” 

“Not to him! It was a single donation directly made to an organization. I never spoke about charity things with Barashi. My father asked my permission to work with these people because our Foundation had nothing on the ground and setting something up would have taken a very long time and those ladies needed help now not tomorrow. This organization wanted to establish safe houses in Germany for the rescued girls.” 

“Your father's legal team set this “New Dawn Foundation” up. They bought a few properties but they were never used and not a single lady came to Germany ever. I only had to follow the trace of the money to find out the truth. Lacroix and Barashi were working together in this.”  

“My father doesn't know Barashi!” Guntram shouted incensed at the accusation. 'But he knows Enrico well.' “Maybe he was also tricked into this! What now? Are you going to go against me because I allowed the Italian and Spanish Komturen to continue with their “import business”? I can't leave people to die in there.”

“Oh, yes; the poor Shia families,” Konrad chortled. “Most of what you got were Sunni fighters escaping Al Assad’s forces. Barashi had quite a business going on there along with Romanians and Greeks. Somebody was paying better than us.”

“Barashi was Shia, not Sunni.” 

“So? Money and Jihad for all,” Konrad smirked. “You thought you were importing poor defenseless Yazidi girls and you got Trans-Jihadis with a Red Cross passport instead.” Konrad's irony made Guntram recoil against the headboard. “They might be roaming all over Europe by now.”

“Those Muslim youths in Marseilles were testing our defenses. They  were supposed to be publicly obliterated as agreed years ago. You should have let Ratko do his work. The men were confused by your change of policy. Our allies were confused by your actions. To be honest, this whole thing looked like an inside job to get rid of all of us and who would get the maximum benefit out of it? You.” 

“What? I got the maximum shit out of this mess.” 

“It doesn't look like that to outsiders. All the first line, including me, went down because of material you had free access to. If we wouldn't know you for so long, anyone would think you sold us.” 

Guntram was appalled. Speechless. 

“You're crazier than I thought,” he whispered. “I…” 

“I know.” Konrad smiled knowingly. “For a chess master who put us down in one day, you looked more like a bear trying to get the honey out of a honeycomb with a bat.”

“If someone would have bothered to say something... or that you were so happy in prison, I wouldn't have made a fool out of myself. In fact, you can all go to hell.” Guntram answered heatedly, obfuscated by the accusation that he could had been a traitor.

“Guntram, it isn't good for you to become upset. It's over. Even Putin sent you a present and we are alright now.” 

“Great. I got a present from a man who would send me to prison just because I sleep with you,” 

“Yet he sent you this present and I might say it did help. Think about it before you start repeating like a parrot what the media say.” 

“Wonderful, I'm a parrot now. Do I get one from Meissen too?” 

“If you want one.” 

“I'm not joking.” 

“Neither am I.” both men glared at each other. 

“That you even considered for a second that I was behind all this...” 

“I never did. Others did it and certainly some people used it to their advantage. It's all settled.” 

“How?” 

“None of your concern. You quitted, remember?” 

“So back to my Consort duties, right?” 

“In a way, yes. Your only duty at the moment is to get well again.”

“You make it sound like a command.”

“You know it isn't. I love you and I care deeply about you. I did what I had to do to protect you. It has always been like that.” 

“We formed an alliance with the Russian Orthodox Church because the path our own church took was leading us astray, away from the dogma. Russia has been consecrated again to Christianity and its views are very similar to our ones. We don't want this unipolar world that crushes everything that doesn't bow to the powers that be. It's unsafe for all of us. You never know who's going to be next in order to keep the machine rolling. If you're where I stand now, you only think in getting richer and richer no matter what you destroy in your wake. The situation that has been created in the Middle-East and Europe can only end in war. And it will be. Do you think anyone cares? No. It won't be their children who will die but ours.” 

“Russians are no better than Americans or Chinese or Germans,” Guntram whispered. “They're all greedy.” 

“Exactly but they can't hit each other so much if none of them has a predominant position. We support the Russian government and we will be more than glad to teach a lesson to these people who think they're on top of  the world.” 

“I think you're seriously mistaken but it is you who decides what's to become of the Order.” 

“Russia is not what you lived under Repin.” 

“I have no problems with Russians. In fact, one just saved my life for the second time.” Guntram sighed. “I don't like this game you're playing. It looks as if you were the traitor now.” 

“Traitor to whom? To the UE? To the United States? How about them? Are our peoples living better than before? This war started many years ago and we all have to choose sides. When I face my Lord, I will be sure of my deeds.” 

Guntram sighed and spooned his body against Konrad's. “I can't conceive my life without you, Maus.” 

“I also.” His husband's hand gently coaxed him into closing the distance between their bodies. Guntram felt the warmth of Konrad's body embrace him and closed his eyes in a mix of content and tiredness. 

“You should rest and leave everything to me,” Konrad said. 

“I don't plan in taking anything over, Konrad,” Guntram admitted. “It's just too much for me. I don't know how you can do it.” 

“Ferdinand once told me I was like the overloaded donkey which asked “what load?” when he was asked how he was coping with it. I hope he didn't had second intentions with his simile but to tell you the truth, I don't know how to be different. I simply can't. It was harder than expected to have Goran to sit in my place. I was getting an ulcer each time I was seeing him sitting in my place.” 

“No, you just had a heart attack,” Guntram mumbled miserably. “Speak about stress.” 

“I've been doing this all my life. I just couldn't step down.” Konrad said earnestly. “I don't think I ever want to repeat this experience and neither does Goran. We are happier now.” 

“It's all my fault. It was my idea.” 

“No, it isn't. We agreed to it. Remember? You just were trying to persuade two old donkeys to drop off their loads and donkeys can be more stubborn that you, Maus.” 

“Then I should be glad both donkeys didn't kick me in the rear.” 

“Maus you should keep yourself away from the stall. Stalls are smelly places.”

“Yes, one can smell the...” 

“I know.” Konrad pressed Guntram against his chest and petted his head as he watched him with true tenderness. “I never wanted any of this for you.” 

“I know,” Guntram mimicked Konrad's accent but his hand made circles on his chest, wishing he could soothe Konrad's troubles away. Once more the delicate balance between them had been established and he didn't want to break it. Anything could demolish the house of cards they both had built together in the past month. 

But there was something still pressing in Guntram's chest. He didn't dare to ask but he couldn't help to do it. Konrad had surely closed his eyes and relaxed under his hand but Guntram knew he would wake up the beast the moment he pronounced the words madly dancing around his head. He was certain that somehow he had been used in a game against his husband but he feared to know how big the manoeuvre had been or how much Konrad really knew about it. 

“Konrad, have you seen my father lately?” he finally dared to ask in the darkness. “He didn't come to the hospital.” 

“I don't know where he is.” Konrad answered without a single inflection on his voice. His voice made Guntram think that his husband was announcing the weather forecast. 

“Didn't you tell him about me?” 

“I tried but he didn't pick up the phone. Later, I was too busy with other things and then, I was told he was nowhere to be found. He's gone Guntram.” 

“What?” Guntram switched on the light and looked Konrad in the eyes. “He wouldn't have left me!” 

“All I know is that his maid went to his house on Monday morning and he wasn't there. Her wages were paid till the end of the year and she also got a very generous lay off. His car was gone along with those security people who were always surrounding him.” 

“Thabo is gone too?” all interior alarms in Guntram flared to life. “That's not possible. He follows Michel everywhere.” 

“All of his money in my bank is still there but we found out that he had some more hidden with de Mornay. He's gone again, Guntram. He was in league with Lahon and the others, and disappeared just like Di Mattei or Gorgazali did when their ruse didn't pay off.” 

“He's my father! He wouldn't leave me to die alone! Where is he, Konrad?” 

“Are you asking me about the whereabouts of a man who abandoned a seven year old in a private school and faked his own death?” Konrad's voice was even, soothing even but the words were like a stab to Guntram's heart. 

“He wouldn't do it again,” Guntram's voice had lost its strength. “Not again. Kurt is his grandchild,” he said feebly. 

“So? You were his son.” 

“Circumstances were different,” Guntram said desperately. 

“Different how? Ah yes, it was the old Vicomte the one who marked the cards and this time, it was you who played on their behalf. Who came to you with that story of the poor raped girls? Those five millions could have been my real downfall, Guntram. You signed right where he told you to, didn’t you?” 

“Of course I did!” Guntram shouted back. “He did his best to get you out of jail! And those women needed the money! I didn't think twice.” 

“I'm sorry to bring you such news, but I can't lie to you. He's gone and the people who knew well who he is, are also gone. I presume he left on Friday with the others and never knew about your illness.” 

“I got hundreds of teddy-bears from people who didn't know me. It was on the news. You have to give me the cards I got. Maybe there's something from him there.” 

“I doubt very much that your father would misspell words and draw hearts in his letters. Guntram, he's gone again. Maybe you hear from him in a few years when he thinks I'm less upset with him. He's a traitor and he will never change.” 

“He wouldn't do it again,” Guntram shook his head. “Not again.” 

Konrad closes his eyes with tiredness but said nothing, letting Guntram drown in his sorrow. He watched the young man sit on the bed struggling with himself to believe what logics told him.

“The stakes in this game are always very high,” Konrad said softly. “I'm sorry for you, Guntram.” 

“He can't do this to me, not again,” he repeated the words like a zombie. 

“We are your family, Maus,” Konrad put his arms around the lithe for of his lover. “We took you in just as you were.” Guntram's eyes, brimming with unshod tears, nearly broke his heart but he couldn't stop now. “I'm sorry this happened again, but you can't let yourself be dragged down once more. You have to get better for your children. They are your family now and this is a family that will never take advantage of your weaknesses and fears.” 

Guntram broke down in tears.